Tuesday, July 7, 2009

The Latest Doctor Visit

So I go in for my 6-month doctor visit. I love my doctor deeply, but the 40-minute wait I endure every time is getting old. If I didn’t bring along a couple of kids every time, it would be a mini-vacation, but I always bring the littlest kids because I think it’s cool for them to watch the process and hear the heartbeat.

We also kill time by weighing ourselves and exclaiming, “I’m so fat!” Just kidding on that one! We DO weigh ourselves, but I make sure they know it’s just a number and that they are healthy and beautiful. On that topic, I’ve gained 9 pounds so far, but that’s because I was a tad overweight to begin with and don’t need to gain 60 pounds, so don’t hate me. I don’t care about being svelte or thin … I just want to be able to chase my kids around and not be out of breath and have my back hurting!

SO! High heartrate on the kid (boy!) … or maybe it’s because I had my 2nd glucose tolerance test prior to my appointment and I had to fast for it … the poor kid was hopped up on 10 ounces of glucose. Fasting was torture … since the blood-letting wasn’t until almost noon.

THEN … he whips out my latest sonogram report. Turns out the idiot who read the sonogram results and gets like $500 to do so put on the paper that they COULD NOT FIND A SECOND ARM, but they weren’t sure.

Folks, I’ve been to the Kid Fields four times and am goin’ back in. I’m not easily rattled.

So I go, “Okay. Could be worse. Missing an arm. No big deal. I’ll just go back for another sonogram so we can either find the arm or start ordering teeny-tiny prosthetics for like every few months since they grow so fast.”

My doc … God love him … is annoyed at the people who read the results and says he’s called them and they SAID they say another arm but he told them he wants it in writing. I gather up my girls and check out.

On my way out, the nurse catches me and says she called the sono place and they TOLD her that Samwich indeed has another arm. YIPPEE!

Another crisis averted. The relief sent me to Burger King for a Whopper Jr.


  1. Yep. Order the kid another arm LOL I love your sense of humour.

    Though I do know children who have arms gone below the elbow. When "things" come up, as a mom it's hard to separate the "is it the arm?" thing from the "oh, that's just a regular bully/jerk/ childhood fallout" thing. Well, you know. But otherwise yeah. Regular kid can go bionic if he wants to later, or more likely, doesn't like chafing machines on his appendages and learns to just do stuff himself his own way :] .

    GOOD for you and your wonderful attitude. Lil Samwich has it all going on. :]


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