Aronisms

Quotes from husband ...

“I like this stroganoff, but the pasta isn’t al dente. It’s more al mushé.”

“Instead of getting a 12-passenger van, let’s just drive my truck around with the boat hooked up to it.” Can you picture a truck with a few kids in it, then me and a few more kids sitting in the fishing boat seats while being driven around on the highway?

Pool Drains

When we were in Branson in June at the Vickery Resort, we couldn’t use their pool. They told my cousin it was because some kid had died (sometime, somewhere) when a pool drain sucked her underwater and wouldn’t let her go, and so they had to replace their pool drain. It was out of commission the entire 4 days we were there.

Sounds like a safe place, right? Very proactive.

WRONG.

I never get to watch morning news shows, but on the 6th I happened to turn on the TV for 5 minutes and caught the Today Show. This pool drain thing was on. Many kids have died from being sucked under. Why now? Why hasn’t this been happening since the beginning of pools?

Turns out a law was passed (only because the granddaughter of a congressman died being sucked underwater by a pool drain … she may have been the one who had her intestines sucked out … not sure).

ALL POOLS (except private backyard pools) were supposed to have replaced their drain covers by the end of 2008. Most pools in the country have not done it yet.

1. Please teach your kids to stay away from pool drains … don’t go diving for a diving stick near one, for God’s sake.

2. Check out every pool you go to or ask the manager. A flat drain is a DEAD giveaway. Some looked curved but are not the new drains.

You bet your butt I called my local pools, and they say they’ve replaced the old drains.

Here’s the problem: there isn’t enough money or enough people to enforce the law. I will totally be a Drain Checker … I’ll start in California and Hawaii. All you have to do is pay my way there. Aron could be the Head Drain Checker for the United States and we could travel all over in our Duggar-like RV that the government would buy us. We’d force pools to close for days and be very unpopular and mean.

More Tresa Worship

Tresa called me on a Sunday night to see if she could come over sometime to teach my kids ways to help around the house. She even offered to make them a chore chart and make instructions for each task, both things I’ve never been organized enough to get to. My good intentions always fell by the wayside.

She presented it not like “you’re a horrible mom and housekeeper” but more like “your husband wants a clean house; you want to write and be a mom … so if your kids are more independent and help out, you can have it all.”

I said, “The only free day we have for like 2 weeks is tomorrow.”

She said, “Okay. Call it a new-baby gift.”

Oh, how I love the creative new-baby gifts … they get better and better the more kids I have. For Eva’s new-baby gift, Ellen refinished 2 of my kitchen chairs!

I could be all pissed off and offended that my friends notice the faults in my house and organization or I can be happy that God sends me help in the form of such friends.

I once knew someone who dropped a friend because the friend brought her over a broom. The broom was brought over because the first woman was pregnant and griping about her husband always taking her broom to work. But instead of saying THANK YOU, this person got mad and assumed her friend was judging her housekeeping.

It’s sometimes hard for me to accept help. I like to think I have it all under control. But nobody has it all under control.

I’m excited to know that someday I will be the one offering the help to mothers, and I hope they accept it instead of taking offense!

So to everyone who helps me out … by babysitting (Mom and Dad), doing my dishes while I’m holding a sleeping baby, bringing me coffee or lunch (Jill and Tresa), listening, reading and commenting on my blog (Julie and my great cousins-in-law and my Bloggy Friends), pricing all my garage sale junk I pass your way (Ellen), bringing over fries for all of our kids to share (Eva) … THANK YOU. I appreciate you all.

The Bro Beater Look

Since Eva doesn't have a wife, this little shirt is her "Bro Beater" or sometimes her "Sis Beater."

Having been in an abusive marriage once upon a time, I hate that a white tank top on a guy is called a Wife Beater. But I also believe you have to have a sense of humor in life.

If not, you get all dark and twisty and negative and mean and hold onto all the crappy moments of your past.

Crooked House

This is the Ripley's Believe it or Not museum in Branson. It's a little dark, I know ... but you get the idea hopefully. I told Aron we should build a house that looks like this since it's just cool and different. He said to wait a few years ... our house will look identical to this one if the kids keep tearing it up.

Book Excerpt and Deep Thought

This is from “True Mom Confessions”:

“Stay-at-Home Mom. Familial ideal or feminist betrayal. Discuss.”

Being a Gemini, I can see both sides. Also being a Gemini, I’m obviously doing the work-at-home mom thing (against my poor husband’s wishes) so I can have my kids and eat them, too. Wait. That doesn’t make sense. I have my kids and my writing.

If you stay at home and that’s “all” … good for you.

If you have a career … good for you.

If you HAVE TO work and don’t want to … that sucks. Read my articles about making money without hiring a sitter at eHow.com.

Spending the Night ... Do you let your kids?

Last weekend the boys spent the night with my dad and step-mom. The night before Independence Day they spent the night with my mom and step-dad. You’d think I’d be thrilled to have only 2 kids to care for. But I was a little bit sad and a little bit bored.

Part of it is selfish. When the boys are gone, Callie won’t sit down in the family room and watch TV by herself. Since I can only seem to relax when I’m nursing a baby to sleep, Callie hangs out with me while I try to write or strip wallpaper. Otherwise, I suck it up, go downstairs and either watch cartoons with her or read while also keeping an eye on Hurricane Eva.

Sure it was nice to go to the pool with only 2 kids and 1 husband to help out. But I’m in 4-kid mode nonstop, so I missed the boys.

The upside is I know they are having fun, being cared for and getting lots of love and attention. I’m a little paranoid about sleepovers and don’t just let them sleep anywhere.

I have several friends who don’t EVER let their kids go to sleepovers … that’s just a family rule. I have certain friends and family I trust to have my kids overnight. You can call me overprotective until you’re blue in the face … but I didn’t plan, help make, grow, grunt out, nurse for 2 years at least EACH, feed, love, hug, kiss, and WANT deeply these kids only to turn them over to someone who has a registered sex offender living underneath them or jump at every invitation to get rid of my kids so I can have some time to myself. It just doesn’t set well with me.

How do you feel about sleepovers outside your home?