Momma Guilt and Confirmation

I know the other day I said I wouldn't be blogging this week, but I had already written this one and just moved it up in the schedule! Enjoy!

Michael says he doesn't look directly at the camera because the light bothers his eyes, something I never knew.

This is a picture from Jordan's 8th grade Confirmation recently. I have 3 stories to tell, the third being about this photo, but they are all about Confirmations.

1. The first year I was a Confirmation sponsor Sam was only about 6 months old. Aron wasn't in town, so I took the other 4 kids with me and they sat with my friend. Sam was fussy so I put him in the sling and carried him in during the procession of the 8th graders. I was a little embarrassed to be carrying in a baby when the focus was on the older kids, but I didn't want to leave him crying with my friend upstairs while we lined up, processed outside and then into the church. That's just not the kind of mom God made me, and I've learned to not worry too much about what people think about that. When it came time to present my Candidate to the Archbishop, Sam was still fussing and I was going to just take him on up, knowing it's not probably general protocol, but also thinking, "I have 5 children and now God wants me to take care of them, even in front of the entire congregation." My friend took him from me at the last minute before I went up, and I heard him crying all the way out of the church. I know he lived and is fine and won't remember, but I hate that sound!
2. The next year I was able to leave all 5 kids at home with Aron for over 3 hours, which I had never done until that night. There was an after party but it was like 9:30 and I had to say no. I wanted to hang with my Candidate, but I felt called to go home and put my kids to bed.
3. This year Aron was going to have to be gone again and I was scrambling for a helper since Jordan was the Candidate and she's pretty much our only sitter! I left the kids downstairs with a family friend while we processed in. Sam was sleepy and needed a nap and I was worried I would have to carry him up to the Archbishop and all that later, so I prayed about it. Jordan said she was okay with it and would not be embarrassed, but she is such a sweetheart that I knew she would prefer it to be about her, and rightly so! I fretted and worried and prayed until time to present her. Then I handed Sam to Joel in the pew behind me and he was FINE for just those few moments! Jordan got her moment, I got to focus on her, it all worked out. Then Sam crashed on me for the rest of the night, as you can see in the picture above!

Anyway, it chaps my butt when people refer to Catholic Guilt. I don't really have that, but I do seem to eternally have Momma Guilt about something or other!!!

Going to Wyoming ...

Well, after a lot of flip-flopping back on forth on deciding, we decided to go to Wyoming after all. Aron sounds really down out there and needs our kind of craziness in person for sure. You can't work 14-hour days every single day of the week for weeks on end without the lovin' of your family, the hugs of your kids, the adoring glances from your wife, a home-cooked meal every now and then ... and we all know I'm a mediocre cook, so if Aron is missing that, he is really missing US in general.

So here's that blog post from a few weeks ago when Aron sent pictures of the kids' stuffed animal travels. It looks gorgeous where we are going. I have a lot to do before we leave, a road trip to plan with 7 people crammed into the mommyvan. I have lodging rates to negotiate even further down because we don't have a lot of money to work with from the company. By the way, always negotiate on rates during the off season! A place could get ZERO or they could get half their normal rate. Half still means they make money.

Anyway, just wanted to let ya'll know I don't know how much I'll be around here this week. Stop by just in case, or just sign up for the email subscription or get the blog on your feed reader. If you're my Facebook pal, you know knew posts pop up automatically on there for your viewing pleasure.

I'm looking forward to quite an adventure, and can't wait to share pictures with you here!

Vintage Rerun Sunday: No TV Week, Day 2

Originally posted 9/3/08

Holy crap, my kids talk a lot. They have each gone over their word quota for the day, which usually is about 10 million words. I never realized how much I rely on taped cable TV shows from Mom to decompress. Joel is asking about watching Darkwing Duck quite a bit. And they are bugging me nonstop while I try to type, which TV would certainly cure. But I am determined. And brave, according to Tresa! And out of my mind!

The book "Dumbing Us Down" said something about the average kid taking in 55 hours of screen time (TV, video games, Internet) per WEEK. We probably do half that, which still seems like a lot of brain rot.

Today the kids played an actual board game with my mom while Aron and I went to the doctor with the baby. It was cool to act like we only had one kid instead of cramming our family of 6 into a 3' by 3' exam room like we usually do. I'd missed Eva's 6-month visit, and now she's closer to 9 months, so I enjoy confounding the nurse and doc when they try to plot weight and height and such on a graph based on age.

Mom brought over 2 new videotapes. My beloved Madmen and Project Runway will have to wait until Saturday night ... or maybe 12:01 a.m. Saturday morning!

Other fun stuff done in lieu of TV: read about different religions to Joel, read him Harry Potter without him falling asleep, Aron and the kids slept in the tent, the kids microwaved and re-froze ice, went to 2 different swimming pools, played at Daddy's work.

Please send all calm and patient thoughts my way. Thank ya. Reminder: I am doing this drug-free and am out of sweet and sour.

April 2012 ... now we try to just watch TV after 7 p.m. at night, but with the sun going down later, they mostly play outside then, too. We also usually try to catch Wild Kratts on PBS in the afternoon, and sometimes I let Eva watch Caillou on PBS also, just so I can get a straight 1/2 hour homeschooling the older kids. And that's why it's called the "TV-sitter" (like babysitter).

Fritz's Restaurant With 5 Great Kids

After the SeaLife Aquarium last week, I was feeling brave and took the kids to Fritz's. They have amazing burgers that are brought to your table by a train on  a track on the wall.

 While I'm trying to find time to work on the new "How I Met Your Father" series about the early years with Aron starting waaaaay back in 1995, I'll dazzle you with some pictures to keep you occupied. These are from when we went to Fritz's at Crown Center in Kansas City. I love these days out with my kids! Have a great weekend!

Sam goes gangsta with his Fritz's conductor hat.

Not how THREE of my kids are doing their new Lego project, courtesy of the SeaLife and LegoLand gift shop. The other two kids got something, too, just not Legos. Daddy and Mommy got Lego keychains that fit together.

You gotta ride the train at the end for 50 cents!!!

And another 50 for the first female conductor.

Just because you're 7 doesn't mean you don't like to have fun!

The Life of a Travel Widow

You've heard of a football widow, right? Those women who are neglected because their man is watching football all season. The woman could stand buck naked in front of the TV, and the guy would move her out of the way. Well, being a travel widow isn't like that because it isn't exactly by choice. But you're still a widow of sorts because you're like a single parent ... only with that all-important paycheck coming in still so you can saunter around the house as a stay-at-home mom, if you choose. Here are some observations about the life of a travel widow:

We do fun stuff to take our minds off Daddy. Then we blog about it so he can see pictures!

1. I love my husband. He loves me. I'm sure there are men who love love love to travel for work because their home life sucks. Their kids are brats, their wife is a nag, and being in the office is boring. When they travel they get to be selfish and do cool stuff like fly on a plane and eat steak every night and watch whatever they want on TV whenever they want. My husband has ALWAYS made it clear he does not like to be away from us. He's either a really good liar or it's true because I've seen him get very sad and upset about leaving us. We hate when he has to leave.
2. Our schedule without him is unpredictable. I am ashamed to admit any sort of schedule goes out the window when he leaves. We eat more sugar, we do more things to keep busy ... play, go places, meet up with friends, stay up later watching TV and reading. Some of this is just to keep me sane, as well, since I'm the only parent.
3. Reintegrating him into our lives isn't always easy. It's easier if he has a nice Monday-Friday travel schedule and we know what's going to happen. But when his schedule is screwy, like now, and we have no clue when he's leaving and coming home, sometimes we look up and he's there and we're like, "Oh, we were headed to so-and-so's house ... did you want to come or stay home for some down time?"
4. The disruption when he get a client who is not clear about the schedule or expectations. You should see my wall calendar ... events scribbled out, rewritten, wite-outed, new plans made with or without the Man of the House.
5. I have to fight myself really hard to not turn into a jaded hardass who tries to run every single aspect of the show all the time, even after he comes home. Many years ago I met women at Aron's company who were HAPPY when their man traveled. THEY got to be selfish and spend the paycheck. I didn't want to be like that. A few of them are divorced now. Travel is hard on a marriage, but ...
6. It might be good for our marriage to be away from each other sometimes.
7. Don't get me started on how travel messes with us using Natural Family Planning! It is frustrating to know that after a long period of abstinence WHEN HE WAS AT HOME, he is leaving town on the day you now have the green light to visit the Boom Boom Room. And he's going to be gone a long time. Grrr.
8. The traveling guy sometimes has to miss things that are important to his family. I try not to kick him when he's down ... he's already missing an important event; he doesn't need me to hop his case about it. So I TRY not to.
9. A travel widow needs extra love ... invite her over for dinner, ask if she needs any sanity time, a coffee, a hug.
10. Don't forget about the military widows! As I gripe about how hard my life is and how much I miss my husband, I think of my friends who have husbands who are gone for a year at a time. That much stink really bad. Is it easier to say goodbye to Daddy and then not have to do that again for a year or to say goodbye to Daddy over and over and over?
11. Don't forget about single parents or real widows! Sometimes I find myself griping about Aron being gone to a woman who has a husband who is a real tool and isn't around anymore. I feel like a jerk and have to apologize!

Don't forget to enter the book giveaway WAY down at the bottom of the blog, or at the bottom of yesterday's post ... it's fickle and moves around!