No Shoes, No Service

By now you’ve probably heard about the Burger King in St. Louis that asked a woman to leave because her 6-month-old didn’t have shoes on. They said it violated a health code.

1. Babies don’t need shoes. Eva is 20 months old and has maybe worn shoes 6 times in her life. She’s a little pigeon-toed, and my doctor (Mr. Ultra Careful) said NOT wearing shoes is the best thing for her. Of course we put shoes on her when the ground is hot, and when winter comes she’ll have shoes and socks. We’re not COMPLETELY stupid.

2. Check your county for “no shoe” health violation codes. I dare you to find one. I once saw on CBS Sunday Morning where a guy NEVER wears shoes. He goes into places and they tell him it’s a health code violation, but it’s not. People just make crap up.

3. We’ve been asked to either put shoes on our little kids (I make my kids 2 and up wear shoes) or leave sometimes, but that’s more because they are afraid the kid will step on a crack pipe and sue. Damn our litigious society and damn that woman who sued McDonald’s for the hot coffee incident.

4. Don’t people have better things to worry about, like making the burger “my way”?

The Best Grandpa

The other night I took a baby doll in for Aron and Eva to play with and called Aron "Grandpa." He says, "I'm gonna be the best grandpa ever. Except I'll be old and damn near dead."

Well, genius, when you're almost 43 and still crankin' out the kids, you're likely to be a grandpa AND still have little ones running around the house. I realize this causes many of you to shudder. It's okay. Just go back to your Wii or your ESPN or your Young and the Restless, and you'll forget all about this blog post soon as if it was/were (I never could remember the difference) a bad dream.

Eva Peeva

This is Eva, my 4th and most naughty child. She's a Table Climber like her sister was. But she's so darn cute I just want to eat her up. My diaper bag is behind her in this picture ... I could carry her in it.

Cleaning Magnet

This is also on my fridge.

Weight Loss Magnet

This is on my fridge.